Tuesday, June 23, 2015
Saturday, January 24, 2015
Hurt
Wow. No man on earth wants me to be their Lifemate. So. My dream of mommy is over. Today will be a sad day. Then tomorrow, I make new goals.
I hurt. My heart is broken.
Friday, January 23, 2015
Romantic Musings
I was told recently that my dream to meet a man who would sweep me of my feet was unrealistic. And yet, I know he is there. Sigh.
I appreciate thoughtfulness. When I get ready to go to work, what a pleasant surprise on a chilly morning, my car has been started for me. Even better is when there is gas in the car too!
When I come home, what a lovely site to behold. Dinner at the dining table waiting. A hot home made from scratch meal not from boxes or cans with a nice glass of wine.
When I walk in the door, my house smells clean and inviting.
When I go to bed, my man is there to cuddle with me until I fall asleep.
When I wake up, my man gets up with me just to see me off. (He would already be up since he started my car already). He helps me find my glasses, my keys, my wallet and my phone. He makes sure I am set for lunch.
What's even better:
Not being called horrible names. Not being punished for returning my tithe to Jesus every month with my hard earned money. Not being made to feel like I am at home. Not monitoring every bite I eat. Not using me. Not picking on me until I cry. Not hogging up all the internet so I can't use it. Not yelling at me because I want to play on my PS3. I don't even get to use it that often!
I appreciate being told I am beautiful. I appreciate flowers. I appreciate being lifted up in prayer. I love hearing "I love you!" "I value you" "I am so thankful for you".
I appreciate thoughtfulness. When I get ready to go to work, what a pleasant surprise on a chilly morning, my car has been started for me. Even better is when there is gas in the car too!
When I come home, what a lovely site to behold. Dinner at the dining table waiting. A hot home made from scratch meal not from boxes or cans with a nice glass of wine.
When I walk in the door, my house smells clean and inviting.
When I go to bed, my man is there to cuddle with me until I fall asleep.
When I wake up, my man gets up with me just to see me off. (He would already be up since he started my car already). He helps me find my glasses, my keys, my wallet and my phone. He makes sure I am set for lunch.
What's even better:
Not being called horrible names. Not being punished for returning my tithe to Jesus every month with my hard earned money. Not being made to feel like I am at home. Not monitoring every bite I eat. Not using me. Not picking on me until I cry. Not hogging up all the internet so I can't use it. Not yelling at me because I want to play on my PS3. I don't even get to use it that often!
I appreciate being told I am beautiful. I appreciate flowers. I appreciate being lifted up in prayer. I love hearing "I love you!" "I value you" "I am so thankful for you".
Friday, January 2, 2015
I gave my heart
I love you! I gave my hearty to you trusting you would protect it and keep it safe. But you broke it. You stomped on my heart till it could no longer brat. You ripped it from my chest with no thought to the effect on me.
I still love you. Take me back! Take me away from all this?! Please??? Help bathe my battle scars. Be my nurse and help me heal. Remind me every day of my value to you. Show me how beautiful I am to you. Help me to understand that I don't need to compare myself to this world because I'm above it all.
Kiss me until I can't stand anymore. Hold me when I melt. Carry me in your strong embrace and show me that your love has no end.
Whisk me away from my torment. Help me see the sun again. Give me back my joy.
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