It has been a while

Wow! I have not kept up with this. I can say, quite a bit has happened since my last post in 2015.  I was feeling pretty low then.

I am still as close to Jesus as ever! I focused all my energies towards Him and He has blessed me.  I have an incredible man in my life now. <3 even="" expected="" p="" this="" who="">
I met my teddybear online about a year and a half ago.  Teddybear says it was 2 years ago. Meh. I know it was about a year and a half ago.  We chatted online for a few weeks. Then he called me. He had said originally that he had a stroke but that he was doing much better. I wrote him off.  I work for state insurance and I did not want anything to mess with my job. A few guys I spoke with wanted advise on how to get more help from the state once they knew what I did for a living. No THANK YOU!

Last January, I met a guy online. He seemed really amazing! He was speaking my love language. Then I met him in person. He is handsome but so so lost. He was still on probation! He was living at a half way house and not yet taking care of his business. I knew right away, he was trying to jump into something he had no business being involved with. So I tried to just be a good friend. Which did not work at all. He wanted an intimate relationship and a place to live when he was done with his obligation. He wouldn't listen to me. He bullied me (he picked up on how much of a push over I am). I ended up changing my locks and one of my brothers at church got involved to help me. I felt bad because I wanted to help him get set up so he could be successful. I don't feel bad now. Jesus knows my intentions.

In March, I had church camp-meeting. This is like a big revival like in the old days. We are outside and we fellowship together. We camp and we picnic and we enjoy where we were. I am so blessed because our camp-meeting was at the lake. It was so beautiful!

My teddybear had texted me the night before after about 8 months of not saying anything. For clarification, he was not my teddybear then. I told him I had plans to be at the lake and invited him to join us. I warned him it was a church thing. This is central in my life! He said he will see what his schedule is like the next day.

HE CAME OUT! The next day, I was helping my friends set up the sound. My teddybear texted me he was on his way if I still wanted to meet him. I got so excited! And, of course, nervous. He drove up in a bus yellow Jeep Wrangler. I was talking to one of my church princesses and about our hike we planned for later that afternoon. Here he walks up to us. I gave him a side hug and we sat down. Brother Mike Tucker was our main speaker and he discussed relationships. Talk about God's planning!

Teddybear got it! He heard what Brother Tucker said! Then we broke out in our individual sessions.  My princess, her mom and my now teddybear when on a 5 mile hike. We were geocaching which was SO MUCH FUN! Teddybear kept up. He didn't complain. He was so helpful! <3 a="" adores="" and="" appreciated="" as="" asked="" back="" brother="" camp="" close="" consider="" could="" course="" dad="" daddy="" for="" her="" him="" i="" if="" left="" liked="" lot="" me="" met="" mom="" my="" nbsp="" of="" on="" our="" p="" princess="" rest="" ride="" said="" she="" site.="" talked="" teddybear="" that="" the="" to="" too.="" walk.="" way="" we="" well.="" who="" with="" yes.="">
We made it back to catch the afternoon service. Brother Tucker talked about dating and respect. He gave a few examples of counseling sessions he had been giving. He spoke to us women (and girls) and to the men (and boys). He stressed respect and honor and loyalty and love. What a blessing!

Teddybear and I walked that evening around the lake. It was romantic and sweet. We checked out "the castle". We watched the sun set. We saw a hawk. It was so lovely. He was very respectful and sweet. God HEARD ME!

Here we are. ALMOST a year later. We are engaged. He has been so incredible! He is loving and respectful. He listens to me. He stops what he is doing to listen to what I am saying. He supports me in my ministries and my hobbies. He encourages me and he loves me!

I thank Jesus everyday for him! I pray to be a good wife. I don't want to disappoint him. I know I will be most successful by staying in prayer every day all day.

God does love me! It isn't because He has trusted me to be in another relationship. Even without teddybear, I am ok. I have a purpose. I have a reason to be. And I am allowed to be me! My teddybear is a blessing I refuse to take for granted. <3 p="">